A New Year's Resolution or Losing Jennifer Aniston

Giving yourself a brand new start at the beginning of a new year seems like such a cliché. I've done it and done it and done it, -- it seems like every single, darn year.

This year, I decided to do something different. I decided to change my life permanently, with gastric sleeve surgery on a chilly Tuesday morning, Dec, 27, 2011. When I weighed in just before surgery, I tipped the scale at 256 pounds. My highest weight was 273 last summer when I started this journey with Dr. Gregory Walton and his staff at WeightWise.

I figure I have about the equivalent of Jennifer Aniston to lose, figuring she probably weighs about 110 to 120 pounds. And just imagine walking around with Jennifer slung around your shoulders. Yikes.

It's the next day, Dec. 28, and I'm so excited about my upcoming journey of getting healthier and hopefully happier with myself.

Partly, it's because my health has been declining the past several years: hypertension aka high blood pressure, sleep apnea, bad knees I've been told will need to be eventually replaced. I kept wondering what's next? Heart problems? Diabetes?

Here's a picture my husband snapped of my figurative toast to my new life -- a warm cup of hot beef broth fresh from the recovery room and ensconced in my hospital room at Summit Health Center in Edmond, Okla.

My very nervous 215-pound, 6'2-inch husband took me to surgery and took every opportunity to talk me out of it. What if we just did the same program without the surgery? He would do it with me. Unfortunately, we've made that same sort of promise so many times and a few weeks later, we're back to eating too much and drinking too much. He's been busy blaming himself, but he nor anybody else forced me to eat or drink too much. The word "no" is in my vocabulary -- a couple of glasses of wine and my resistance is down and I'm noshing like crazy.

I am having conflicted feelings of being selfish and denying him the communal experience -- at least for awhile -- of sharing the same meal we've made together. Or adult beverages on the back porch, accompanied by cocktail shrimp or smoked salmon with cream cheese, crackers and accompaniments. And then dinner like a grilled steak, veggies and salad. Really I was eating twice though.

But in other ways, I feel like I'm trying my best to save my life and make our adventures the most we can make them. We've been on trips, like one to Italy, when walking was very much required and I just couldn't keep up.

My husband lost two of his closest, long-time male friends in 2011 -- one wasn't a surprise and one completely blindsided us. I know he was scared of losing me too, -- but on the flip side, I was scared if my health went further down, he would lose me too.

I spent the night in the hospital, sipping broth and water and came home this morning feeling pretty good. I'm tender around the middle as expected and I have six "superglued" small incisions from the gastric sleeve laparoscopy also known as sleeve gastrectomy. This will allow me to shower immediately, although I can't take a bath, hot tub or swim for six weeks. Not a problem.

Onward!