Let Me Count the Ways I've Tried ...

I think I've been on a diet my whole life and I guess that's going to continue for the rest of it. Happily, with my brand-spankin' new Gastric Sleeve, I have a tool that will help me stay on it and force the issue a bit. OK, more than a bit.

I feel like I've tried almost every diet out there and that's no exaggeration. I've tried and I've tried and I've tried and I've tried. Here's some of the ways:

• Weight Watchers: Really my favorite because it's balanced. It was always my go to diet, but I had trouble staying on it because of our lifestyle, going back and forth to visit my husband who works in West Africa. Then he comes home about every eight weeks or so and wants to be "on vacation," which translates to eating and drinking probably more than we should. Then I go see him and we do the same thing. About the time I would get momentum, it would go buh-bye out on the deck with martinis and a little smoked salmon plate.

• South Beach: Worked pretty well, but same problem as WW. Some pretty decent recipes in their cookbooks.

• Jenny Craig: I'm too good of a cook to last long on Jenny Craig. Just thought most things were tasteless and expensive.

• Nutrisystem: I lost my pregnancy weight with Nutrisystem, although I have the same problem with them. Tasteless. Then I even went on Nutrisystem for a radio station I used to work for, and I'd run into the diet police at the grocery store -- peering into my basket to see what groceries I had in there.

• Fen-Phen: Loved fen-phen in the mid-90s. Loved it! I had to be reminded to eat and lost weight like crazy. Lost about 42 pounds and then the boom (heart valve defects) came down on it and it was suddenly off the market. Sigh. Weight came back like iron filings to a magnet however.

• Diet Center: I don't remember much about this one, but it was a long time ago.

• Hypnosis and Mental Gastric Band: I think my head is just too stubborn for this, although I loved my hypnotherapist (who will remain unnamed.)

• Hypnosis and little steel balls under tape that went behind my ears: Ditto, and those steel balls were supposed to simulate acupuncture. Rub them when you were hungry and it was supposed to go away. Didn't work.

• Atkins: Worked but became bored with only eating protein. Used something similar to whip off the last five to 10 pounds for pageants in my early 20s and was very effective.

• Reynolds Clinic/Oklahoma City: started with a two-day juice fast and the doc provided thyroid drugs and some kind of uppers. Pretty balanced diet and got down to 115 pounds on this one in the late 70s, early 80s, just in time for my 10-year high school reunion.

I'm sure there were others like the Grapefruit Diet, or the Standing on Your Head Eating Sardines Diet, but they all just kind of mush together.

The gastric sleeve surgery I had Dec. 27, is the first best hope I've had in a long time that I'll get back to being fit and trim. It really is going to happen this time, and I'm so excited to be on this journey. I'm feeling very empowered.

My next goal is to dispense with weighing every day. Just too much fun right now, but I know the "Big Stall" is coming -- I've been warned -- and so probably after my two-week appointment Monday, and weigh-in, I'll go to once a week.

Here We Go

Oh me of little patience.
I'm now on Week Two of my gastric sleeve adventure and suddenly my body shifted into overdrive. Five pounds, two pounds, two pounds in the past three days.
I confess I was having these terrible doubting thoughts -- 'oh no, maybe my body might not even lose weight with weight loss surgery.'
Wrong.
Thankfully.
I've just failed on so many efforts to lose weight, I had some little irrational fear that somehow my body would figure out a way to trip me up yet again.
I'm mildly fatigued, a tiny bit hungry but not bad, and yearning for that next soft food stage. Scrambled eggs will never have tasted so good when I get there next week.

Marvelous Melting Woman Debuts -- Day Six

Today, I feel like I'm bloomin' into 2012, and a lot like my magnificent amaryllis.

The scale budged in a big way when I got up this morning -- finally. It had been 256 pre-op Dec. 27, 256 post-op Dec. 27, 256, 256, 256, 256, 256 ... and this morning, it was 251. Five pounds -- hallelujah!!! My friend promised it would start moving downward and it finally has. Hooray!

It was an incredible mental boost, just when I was wearying of the liquid two-week diet you go on after gastric sleeve surgery. I'm now at the halfway point of my two week liquid diet.

The lovely amaryllis at its peak was eight blooms strong, now down to six and about to be four. But it's just been glorious to watch.

Onward ...

C2F

When Life Hands You a Liquid Diet

... You make the best beef broth you can muster with what you have on hand.

The good part is that I had two sets of bones from our standing rib roasts for a big Christmas dinner (aka known as my last meal.) I also had fresh thyme, rosemary and sage from my garden that I made into a bouquet garni. I'm already ahead of the game.

I wanted to eat with darlin' hubby for supper, so I first made the beef broth this morning, put it in the fridge for awhile while we went to Girl With the Dragon Tattoo this afternoon (Excellent, I'd give it an A-). Then I chilled it, skimmed the fat and portioned it all out in 1 and 2 cup sizes to freeze or use in some French Onion Soup for hubby. I'll add some big ol' pieces of baguette and some gruyére cheese to the top and stick it under the broiler. I'll be having some righteously good beef broth while he partakes of the other. A decent compromise.

I was struggling emotionally a bit because I hadn't started losing yet and was stuck at my pre-op weight of 256. I'm still pretty swollen around the mid-section though and the doc took my off a high blood pressure med that is a diuretic, so I need to quit-my-bitchin'. I joined an online support group and their calm feedback is helping a lot.

Onward and downward on Day Six ...

Carol

Rumors of Day Three Being Toughest Debunked

A day after my weight loss surgery Tuesday, I got a text from my younger brother Bob in New York City.

"How are you feeling? Was it a slice or a laparoscopic? After surgery, Day 3 is always the challenge."

Well, Day Three has come and gone and it was very much like Day 2, which wasn't all that tough.

I mean, I had a C-section when my daughter was born. That was tougher pain-wise.

I've had two bunionectomies (one each foot). Those were tougher pain-wise.

Basically, the time things hurt is when I get up, which I'm trying to frequently. And if there's anything that is tough, it's the liquid diet for the first two weeks.

The day before my surgery you drink all clear or see-through liquids, and that evening my husband pointed out that gin is clear liquid, also chardonnay. Funny man. I didn't have any, even though I did think twice about it.

Held Together by Glue -- No Joke!

Day Three and I'm going great guns. To see me, you wouldn't know I had gastric sleeve surgery only two days ago, Dec. 27, 2011.
For some reason, Lady GaGa's song "Show Me Your Teeth," is stuck in my head, because the first thing my husband wanted to see when I was out of the recovery room and in my hospital room was the incisions from the laporascopic procedure.
There are six of them. Three are only about a half-inch across, like the one I took of myself a few minutes ago, shown at the right. The other three are about 1-inch to the largest at about 1 1/4-inches. The incisions have absorbable sutures and Dermabond® glue on top of them.
That's right, I'm essentially super glued together, although not with the registered trademark Super Glue itself. Interestingly, that technique came from medics doing field surgery with glue during the Vietnam War. Topical skin glues were developed after that specifically to close wounds.
The fun part is that it allows me to shower immediately. I just can't take a tub bath, get in a hot tub or swim for six weeks. I'm thinkin' in January, the latter two are not too high on my priority list. Would be nice to take a tub bath, but I'm not complaining.
Best thing is the incisions don't hurt at all; although they do itch a bit and I'm keeping my hands off of them. I understand the glue will eventually peal off in a couple of weeks.
Biggest challenge right now is trying to get out of bed, off the sofa or out of a car, which takes muscles in that zip code. But it's not nearly as challenging as I thought it might be.
Walking has been nice and it's highly recommended to do it often. My little rescue dog Lucy is very excited about that idea.
So about two-and-a-half days down and about 12 to go on the Stage 1 two-week liquid diet.

A New Year's Resolution or Losing Jennifer Aniston

Giving yourself a brand new start at the beginning of a new year seems like such a cliché. I've done it and done it and done it, -- it seems like every single, darn year.

This year, I decided to do something different. I decided to change my life permanently, with gastric sleeve surgery on a chilly Tuesday morning, Dec, 27, 2011. When I weighed in just before surgery, I tipped the scale at 256 pounds. My highest weight was 273 last summer when I started this journey with Dr. Gregory Walton and his staff at WeightWise.

I figure I have about the equivalent of Jennifer Aniston to lose, figuring she probably weighs about 110 to 120 pounds. And just imagine walking around with Jennifer slung around your shoulders. Yikes.

It's the next day, Dec. 28, and I'm so excited about my upcoming journey of getting healthier and hopefully happier with myself.

Partly, it's because my health has been declining the past several years: hypertension aka high blood pressure, sleep apnea, bad knees I've been told will need to be eventually replaced. I kept wondering what's next? Heart problems? Diabetes?

Here's a picture my husband snapped of my figurative toast to my new life -- a warm cup of hot beef broth fresh from the recovery room and ensconced in my hospital room at Summit Health Center in Edmond, Okla.

My very nervous 215-pound, 6'2-inch husband took me to surgery and took every opportunity to talk me out of it. What if we just did the same program without the surgery? He would do it with me. Unfortunately, we've made that same sort of promise so many times and a few weeks later, we're back to eating too much and drinking too much. He's been busy blaming himself, but he nor anybody else forced me to eat or drink too much. The word "no" is in my vocabulary -- a couple of glasses of wine and my resistance is down and I'm noshing like crazy.

I am having conflicted feelings of being selfish and denying him the communal experience -- at least for awhile -- of sharing the same meal we've made together. Or adult beverages on the back porch, accompanied by cocktail shrimp or smoked salmon with cream cheese, crackers and accompaniments. And then dinner like a grilled steak, veggies and salad. Really I was eating twice though.

But in other ways, I feel like I'm trying my best to save my life and make our adventures the most we can make them. We've been on trips, like one to Italy, when walking was very much required and I just couldn't keep up.

My husband lost two of his closest, long-time male friends in 2011 -- one wasn't a surprise and one completely blindsided us. I know he was scared of losing me too, -- but on the flip side, I was scared if my health went further down, he would lose me too.

I spent the night in the hospital, sipping broth and water and came home this morning feeling pretty good. I'm tender around the middle as expected and I have six "superglued" small incisions from the gastric sleeve laparoscopy also known as sleeve gastrectomy. This will allow me to shower immediately, although I can't take a bath, hot tub or swim for six weeks. Not a problem.

Onward!